Special Entry: For YOU, and YOU... (Part 2)

Assalamualaikum & Hye. 

Dear YOU 2;

Firstly, sorry for my sudden message in your Fb. It may bother you somehow, and I'm sure it really is. I don't know if you gonna read this or not coz I'm not sure if you know that I have a blog or not. Btw, it's okay. I gonna write it here, perhaps you'll read it someday. 

I don't have any idea how to start this actually, and about the Fb message; it really need some strength of mine to press the 'send' button. Sorry again sbb timbulkan balik hal ni, while you really2 wanna forget it. You broke your wings, and have to learn fly again.. It is hard, I know. But I do think it is compulsory for me to say something, coz silence sometimes doesn't mean okay. 

"I am certain that people never forgive because they believe they have an obligation to do it or because someone told them to do it. Forgiveness has to come from inside as a desire of the heart. Wanting to is the steam that pushes the forgiving engine."

Lewis B. Smedes 

Just like I said before, asking for forgiveness will never clear up things. But it doesn't mean it can't change anything. Maybe not the situation, coz we can't step back and start it over again, but between us, I hope it will change something.Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.I hope xkan ada benda yg disimpan dalam hati, sampai bila-bila. If you really mad at me, just spill it out. At least I know, how it really feels. Please..  

I do know that if I'm sorry, I shouldn't do it. But I do know, that IF I could expect things, then I'll not do mistakes. I'm only a human being, who will, always, do mistakes. That's what we are, we are all human being, sis. And what we should do is just learn from that mistakes. 

To your friends, 

Sorry for ruin your beloved friend. Actually I was a bit suprised when you use that phrase, 'ruin'. I keep blaming myself, is that really what I am doing? So, its worst than what I've expected. Sorry, sorry, much sorry. I do understand how it feels to see your beloved one hurts. And you know what, I adore all of you, coz you really love her, that's why it hurts you too. 

To you, 

I know things will be hard for you, so do I. I'm not that happy since I've hurt someone else, which is you. I know you wanna get rid of me, doesn't want to remember any single things about me. You keep it silent, in a small corner in your broken heart. But sis, sejauh mana pun kita lari, in fact kita sure akan terjumpa juga each other, maybe tidak selalu, tapi there will be, someday. It'll be a bit awkward, tp at least not much as we are now. 

I'll not talk much, coz the more I talk, the more it gonna hurts you. I just hope that you'll forgive me, satu hari nanti. It takes time, but its okay. I can endure that pain. I'll be waiting, always waiting. And when you already have it for me, hope that you would let me know. Its my fault, and that's why I deserve this. Thanx for reading my message, thanx for spending your precious time to read this note. I appreciate it. And again, sorry.

Wishing you a great blessings of Him, wherever, in whatever n whenever you are. Hope you'll be happy with someone in the future. Always pray for you...

p/s: Sy tau, apa-apa pun yg sy cakap is meaningless for now. Everything will not be right and people will keep talking about me. I understand, coz that's the risk I've to take when I did mistakes.

p/s/s: Sis, you may lost someone you love, but look.. You have such a wonderful friends, who really2 love you.. It's the most wonderful gift from Him, and yes, it make me some kind of jealous.. :') 

Yours Truly,

The one who's seeking for your forgiveness.

Nothing worth doing is completed in our lifetime;
Therefore, we are saved by hope.
Nothing true or beautiful of good makes complete sense in any 
immediate context of history;
Therefore, we are saved by faith.
Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone;
Therefore we are saved by love.
No virtuous act is quite as virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or 
foe as from our own;
Therefore we are saved by the final form of love, which is forgiveness.